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Editorial: Princess Zelda's Voice Is Gross AF

Look, I love The Legend Of Zelda: Breath Of The Wild as much as the next 100/100 review, but we have to talk about Zelda's voice. If you haven't played the game yet,  take a look at that picture above  and listen to the voice in the video below: 

First off, what the f*** has Zelda been doing these past 100 years? Has she been drinking brandy in a cigar smoke filled bar? This voice does not match the youthful princess we see in all the cinematic segments. It's maddening because every time I hear her voice it's like nails on a chalkboard, and you hear her voice a lot. 

She's not just in the cinematic elements, mind you, she's also in her head. You'll hear her a lot in the tutorial segment, and if you're someone who never lets Link sleep you'll cringe every time you see the air turn red around you as Zelda interrupts to caw out...

" DA BLUD MOON RISES WONCE AGANE LANK."

And that accent, I don't understand it! She is literally the only person with that accent. Not even her father has that voice so where TF did it come from? The weird part is her voice doesn't even sound like a true English dialect either, it sounds like someone trying to emulate a UK accent but then casually slipping back into their American pronunciation whilst still doing the voice when it suits them. It's just so gross I can't stand it. 

We seriously got the short end of the stick...listen to her vs. the other actresses for other translations...note Zelda's voice is always the 3rd voice you here in this compilation. The first two are Impa and The King: 

SHE SOUNDS GREAT IN LITERALLY EVERY LANGUAGE BUT OURS. How did this happen? Did Japan overextend and keep Nintendo Of America out of the production process for the game? I sure hope so, because whoever cast that voice actress as Zelda made a big mistake that drives me up the wall every time she speaks. 

I love voice acting in Zelda, but please Nintendo, next time let's spend more than $100 and a cheese sandwich on your lead actress.